He wasn’t
going to be late today right? I mean he couldn’t. He promised he’d be the first
to arrive. Among all the chaos that the city had to provide, the hassles of work
and once in a while the pressures of life, he is my only respite….my oasis of calm
in the scorching desert sun…but why does this delay give me jitters of anxiety?
Insane, I say to myself….work remember? But even today? Two meetings with the
city dealer, a couple of assignments which require auditing…..the list of work
that I have kept pending for this one
weekend off is endless….but does he even realize how much this means to me? Or does
his work feature above anything in this world in his priority list. But relax
it is just a few minutes past his promised time…but with every passing minute a
miniscule sense of guilt mixed with remorse was trickling down the nape of my
neck. The guilt of leaving “important” work and deciding to take this little
vacation. But wasn’t it all that I wanted for a very long time? Why does doing
what you love doing and the guilt of leaving “work” undone come in a tangled
bundle? The mind should be free….the soul a little more happy of finally seeing
that happen which it yearned for….but….maybe
I should just learn to relax a little more, too much heightened sense of
tension has as if become a norm, seeping into my very person….but the clock
ticks by…..
The framed
photograph on the mantle beaming away in the flickering ochre of the fire below….I
really like this one. We look so happy in this one. And yes the little story
behind his blue cummerbund is something which still amuses me, the light
bouncing off my left earring and the string of pink pearls on the bodice of my
dress, it was his choice, and little wave on his brown hair….tiny little
details makes this picture very pretty….the
clock won’t stop….
I had the
music he loved playing on the stereo…There
are these guys from Serenity Studios making really good music and he simply
loves them…I wore blue, the georgette dress I treated myself to last month, its
lace detailing is so intricate….the Dom Perignon specifically ordered for today
and yes I got some fine cheese to go with it….the setting was perfect….but was
it enough? I repeatedly told myself I would not be dialing his number, that
would ruin the whole thing….that thing about not letting technology come in
between communication…I know it is difficult to grasp but sometimes you just
need to let your hearts do all the communication….the clock is still ticking…
“May be I
will be forgiven for being late by 1200 seconds….” The baritone in the hallway
was all I was waiting for in the past few minutes….And then I saw him walking
towards me, that smile, which is everything I wait for in the long times we are
separated by geography, by work, by the constraints of modern life, gleaming on
his face, that same little wave on his brown hair and the sharp suit with the
lapel pin I gave him for his last birthday….this is the man I love with all the
love available in this universe…..”Purple gladioli are so difficult to find in
this city”…..Life is a perfect melody and he my best present….
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